1 Corinthians 4:10-14 (New Living Translation)

 10 Our dedication to Christ makes us look like fools, but you claim to be so wise in Christ! We are weak, but you are so powerful! You are honored, but we are ridiculed. 11 Even now we go hungry and thirsty, and we don’t have enough clothes to keep warm. We are often beaten and have no home. 12 We work wearily with our own hands to earn our living. We bless those who curse us. We are patient with those who abuse us. 13 We appeal gently when evil things are said about us. Yet we are treated like the world’s garbage, like everybody’s trash—right up to the present moment.

 14 I am not writing these things to shame you, but to warn you as my beloved children.

Matthew 18:18  (NLT)

18 “I tell you the truth, whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden in heaven, and whatever you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven.

I don't have a lot of recollections of grade school, but there was one episode that I will never forget. You see, I was a real clown in many of my classes. I was the guy that brought gum to sell or was flipping coins and cashing in on my classmates with my good luck and ability to win at "Heads or Tails," that was a coin flipping game. I had one teacher who a few times didn't give me the presumption of innocence. I didn't even have a chance to sell a pack of gum, but before class he would call me up to the front and have me empty my pockets. Out came five or ten packs of gum, a few Bic lighters and a lot of change. I felt that it was unAmerican to say the least. I mean, "Hey, at least catch me in the crime, Geesh!"

I had another teacher and she was a "card." Once or twice she had verbally abused me by trying to ridicule me in front of the entire class. Just for no other reason, I guess, but because I had a brother that went before me who she didn't like?

Then there was the time that I was in "Homeroom." Thinking back, I must have really respected or liked this teacher. I say that because one day she announced to the class that she was not going to be there on that Friday. I think she even suggested and pointed out a few of the "talkers" or "trouble makers," such as myself.

Well, we sat at tables of six or so, as I recall, and on that day I pointed out to my classmates that I was going to honor this teachers wishes. I even stated that I was not going to say "one word," the entire class. No matter what. Hell or high water, I was not going to talk, I stated.

Friday came, however, and my classmates had gotten together and were determined for me to "talk." To this day, I remember that there were about five or six people who did everything possible to get me to talk. During the entire time, they were even laughing and joking about it thinking that eventually they could get me to talk. I was determined, however, and some how I had made it through the entire hour class without having said anything. I recall that it was very difficult because I had a slew of people planning and scheming for me to just say one thing and therefore to break my promise of being good and to honor this teacher's wishes.

The next week, on Monday, before the class began, I was called out in the hall by this teacher and with her was a classmate we will call "Gayle." (Not her real name) Well, the teacher began by asking me about the previous Friday and what exactly went on or something like that. I told the teacher that I had made up my mind to not talk and had gone through the entire class without saying a "word."

Now remember, I was completely innocent and couldn't imagine what this entire thing was about?

Well, to my utter surprise the teacher shared with me what this "Gayle," had been sharing with her. I can't even remember what the accusation was, but it was completely fabricated and proven false by the mere truth that I had not spoken a "word," that previous Friday.

Well, I was in shock. I was so crushed emotionally I even teared up. I think that that was the only time that I ever showed that kind of like emotion in school, but it just came out. You see, I could just never imagine a person could stand before you and to bring such an accusation all along staring you in the face.

How do you react to that?

Tonight, I was listening to Martha McCallum interview the Kavanaughs. Afterward, in a follow up show she pointed out that when Clarence Thomas was going through the same thing, he showed a righteous indignation, whereas Brett Kavanaugh seemed to be more quiet and meek against his accuser.

Well, that to me shows me that he ought to be dis qualified, right?

I ask you, "How are you suppose to respond when an army of professionals come against you with such vicious accusations?

Nevertheless, the meeting ended with the obvious assertion, that someone such as "Gayle" could never ever in a thousand years fabricate a false charge, therefore it was ultimately true. No one ever defended me from the falsity of the accusation, though there were many who could have.

Well, I can hear my detractors now, "Gee John, you need to forgive that person, obviously if you remember it you have to be carrying a hatred and animosity toward the woman."

No, not at all, she has been forgiven and forgotten many times over in the course of my life. I say many times, because I am talking about when ever she comes to mind, I immediately acknowledge my forgiveness and put her out of my mind. Nevertheless, the incident was a part of life and I can't help but to remember it, as it taught me a little about human nature.

You see, I always felt lower than my teachers, my neighbors, the business owners, and even some class mates. Though I was blessed to be raised middle class, my Father was always working and struggling to care for his family.

Well, then at twenty one years old, I became born again. I will never forget the night, alone in a graveyard chapel, I talked to the Jesus that was up front hanging on a Catholic Crucifix.

I said, "Jesus, I don't know who you are or what you are, but I know that you have something to do with God."

I continued, "If you can, will you help me."

And at the moment that I stated that last sentence, something broke on the inside of me. It was as if a river of pain and heartache was just ushering and flowing out of me. I was weeping uncontrollably and I could barely breathe because of convulsions brought on by my weeping.

At the same time, I had a vision of a huge blackboard that was filled with hudreds or thousands of sins recorded. Then, I saw a human hand erasing line upon line of all my recorded sins. As it was finally, coming to an end my weeping had finally subsided and I remember I was just about to take a huge breath of air, and then it filled up again just as full as the first time. All of a sudden, I was weeping again and could barely contain myself.

I am not sure of the time, but when it was finally over, when my weeping and repenting had stopped, I walked out of that little chapel and I felt as if I was the cleanest man on the earth. No one can ever understand fully the feeling that one has on earth when God himself has cleansed your soul, so that you are worthy of heaven itself. There is nothing unholy in heaven and if you never experience this "born again" cleanliness act, please do not expect God to let you in the back door. There is no back door to heaven.

Well, I went back to Detroit and was off my drugs and alcohol abuse. It lasted for maybe six months or so, I don't recall exactly. Soon, however, I was back abusing the drugs and the alcohol. This continued for a couple of years. it was during this time, that I visited a priest, I ask the man, "How, how can I experience that again of, 'what happened in the graveyard?'"

The man hadn't a clue, I could tell, he looked as if he was a deer staring into a set of headlights and who was about to be splattered all over the road? When I walked out of that Parish, I said, "God can't help a drug addict."

You see, I always thought that the priest was the closest thing to God.

"Didn't God use priests to talk to the people?"

Soon, I was in a drug house, and one of the guys there had just overdosed and died. When I heard it, I told them, "Hey, if I ever overdose, grab my feet and drag me out to the back alley."

"Do not call EMS, my parents, my brother, the police, anybody, just drag me out there and let me die."

I continued, "I have tried to do everything to get off these drugs, God can't even help you, just lay me out in the back alley and let me die."

I was very serious, too.

Well, a week or two later, I was in that drug house, the following morning, I woke up in a hospital over dosed on heroin. I was so angry.

I would have to face my mother, whom I knew, would be so ashamed of the fact. The EMS would soon be billing me another 500 dollars on top of my other debt. There were other issues and I was very angry for this happening.

Well, once more I called out to Jesus, but I didn't call out. I actually raised my voice and I shouted in anger. I said, "JESUS, once more I am asking you if you can help me, then please HELP ME, other wise I am going to walk right out of here and will end up dead in another few weeks or so."

You see, I knew that I would end up on drugs again, so I was very serious when I shared with the Lord that I would soon be dead if he didn't help me.

To me it was as audible as any one else talking to me standing a foot away. He said, "John, I want you to leave Detroit and I want you to move to Lansing and to go learn about me."

Well, I knew exactly what He was saying. I had a cousin who went up to Michigan State University, a number of years back that was an A student. A year or two later, he came back down a Hippie, and I remember once he was explaining to me what a pentagram was, as someone was wearing it on an album cover.

He went back to Lansing, and a few years later came down as a Jesus Freak. In Detroit, I only met one Jesus Freak, but he was back on drugs a few months after his conversion. My cousin, however, would come down every year at Christmas when our families would get together and would always want to talk about Jesus. I was the only one who would listen though.

Well, when the Lord spoke to me to move to Lansing, I knew exactly what He meant. I called up this cousin and I said, "Bob, you are not going to believe this but Jesus spoke to me and told me to move up there."

I mean, I thought that the guy was going to think that I was crazy?

Instead, He said, "John, that's great come on up."

My cousin was converted during the Charismatic Renewal when the Holy Spirit fell on college campus all over the nation. As He did, some formed prayer groups, while others formed "Communities."

These Communities were began on the basis of emulating the early church of the Book of Acts. Before you joined one of these you had to commit your self to following Jesus wholeheartedly. If you were single they wanted you to give up dating or the idea of dating until you first built a strong relationship with the Lord. If you were engaged they wanted you to seriously commit your selves to holiness and to refrain from any serious romantic involvement until you both finished a year commitment to follow the Lord.

They wanted all to join the church where they held private meetings, but only if you had shown true commitment and had proven yourself by attending all open services and classes.The classes were many and all were free. If you signed up for them you were expected to go. In the beginning there were many, the first was called, "The Life in The Spirit," class. This was where they taught about the Baptism of the Spirit, and would pray for each individual to receive the fullness of the Holy Spirit.

If you finished that class and wished to further commit there was a "Life in the Spirit Two" class. After that there were many other classes you were expected to take and in each one of them, I had found various healing and deliverance. There were classes on handling emotions, classes on forgiveness, inner healing whatever and they were all free. Part of the process of being a member was to schedule your time. We scheduled time for scripture, prayer, work, exercise, everything in order to live the most productive life that would please the Lord. This was why there were always ample teachers, leaders, as well, as musicians to hold classes or to help disciple the new people who would become filled and baptized with the Holy Spirit and who had an innate desire to follow Jesus. After a few years, I had become a very strong and anointed Christian.

Again, I want to point out that no body was charged for any classes, musicians were not paid, even many of the top leadership was not on a salary.

When an individual made a commitment to follow Jesus in one of these communities they were not playing church. Every thing that we had was solely devoted to the "Work of Christ," which was the name of our community.

This was why the Holy Spirit could knit and form each one of us into a small body of committed Christians who each cared for their brother and sister as if we were blood. When the apostle Paul talks about one person hurting and it affecting the whole body, I saw this phenomenon in reality.

When we worshipped for forty five minutes to an hour singing together in tongues, I once witnessed the saints looking down from bleacher type seats in an arena and calling us to continue our races. When our tongues were brought together as one voice I witnessed God's heavenly angels visiting us and walking amongst us.

At various times, I witnessed my tongues coming out of my mouth as fire and daggers having left to tear down the strong holds that I had been mysteriously praying for.

It was my personal commitment that also made this a reality in my life. When I told the Lord that I would follow Him, I meant all the way to martyrdom. You see, at the time, we had many prophecies given that to this day I see are being filled before my eyes. Many of these warned of a time when society would be at odds with Christianity, just as it was in the early church.

I for one have seen many of these prophecies fulfilled in just the last ten years. Our society has been transformed to darkness, and it is by far not over. I expect to see the kind of martyrdom that we read about in the early church before my death and my welcome into heaven.

A few years after I left the community, I was introduced and brought into the other forms of Charismatic Christianity. I am talking about the various Pentecostal and Charismatic movements of the last twenty to thirty years. In comparison to many hundreds and possibly thousands of prophecies heard in these other churches there has been very little similarities. The reason for this is because of the level of maturity found in most churches today.

You have very little commitment from any of the laity, the clergy or leaders, as they have all been consumed with financial gain and the church itself has become simply big business. There is very little difference between a professionally run business and a modern day church. The goals are all the same, and the standards in the church that Jesus gave have all been replaced by worldly standards.

A typical prophecy from one of these churches is about how the Lord has laid up for his faithful market place maneuvering in order that you may bring the riches of the world into the kingdom, thus having an ample amount of money to tithe to your Pas..I mean churches.

This is why I guess I have always had trouble with many of these churches. To my utter dismay, the Lord has never explained to me how He went from one type personality to another. In that community I saw a God who was preparing a people to do battle against evil by equipping them with knowledge and Spiritual gifts in order to save the future souls of the sons and daughters who would soon be populating the earth. I heard prophecy upon prophecy and they had nothing to do with equipping our pocket books with dollar bills. He promised no jet planes, no huge mansions, no Rolls Royce, not even a shack by the river where you could eventually catch a trout or two?

No, his prophecies were all warnings of what society would soon be coming into and how that we had very little time to prepare for the onslaught of evil that was to fill the earth.

But, as I stated when I came into the "real" church, the mature church, where these guys all call themselves apostles and prophets the Lord just changed all of a sudden?

I guess, it was something like on that fifties show back a few years ago. Perhaps, the latter churches that I am talking about were all like Fonzies gang, so when the Lord came to visit these guys, He bunched up his collar put on his leather coat, black boots and donned a chain or two, so he would be "cool" in their eyes?

What do you think?

Or, on the other hand, perhaps these guys made a Jesus of their own liking.

What is that ol saying?

"Where your heart is that is where your treasure is."

Perhaps, their treasure is only found in the riches that can immediately satisfy their lust for a worldly life?


Part Two


A few years ago, I left my residence and went all over the United States looking for a church or community of like minded people who were hungry after God. I checked out a church in South Carolina, one in Las Vegas, another in Northern California and then I ended up in one n the Mid West.

I started driving a truck to support myself as I had supported myself by working all of my life. Many times, putting myself through school by working two jobs or working as I went to school.

After a while I quit driving and I was spending all my time, within this churches prayer room. The more that I got involved in the prayer room and the community there I began to learn things. These were not good things or healthy things that belonged in a church. What I also found was a very wicked leadership that allowed and condoned much evil that could and was adversely affecting the children and young people that were being brought into this church.

The Lord began to show me many things and I would write about them on my web sites. Many times, my writings would produce a reaction from the leadership and some things changed. There was still much sin and I just couldn't imagine how some of these people had become leaders. I guess that I was very naive at the time. The Lord was showing me these things and I would expose them assuming that they would be resolved righteously.

I mean, isn't it the Lord who is revealing these things to me, surely I ought to be safe in exposing them, why else would He be making all of these leadership sins so blatantly obvious to me.

That was my thinking at the time. And then something so horrendous happened that I could barely believe it happened.

There was a girl that was brought to a house of some various women worship leaders and she was assaulted. Not only was she assaulted but these women sheared her hair either by drugging her and getting her so drunk that she passed out.

Can you imagine that?

I couldn't. This was suppose to be a church where these people spent twenty four hours in prayer?

I felt that it was my duty to let the rest of the "Body of Christ," know. This was a place where churches were sending their youth. What had been going on in this church or cult as it easily became clear to me what it was was a cover up of all cover ups. As I let numerous churches aware of what had transpired, none gave a damn.

Well, after observing the Charismatic churches for decades their response was actually not shocking to me. You see, for years, I had made comment that in our modern Charismatic/Pentecostal churches there was one mantra that was similar and had prevailed in almost every church. And it was this, "As long as it doesn't affect my tithes, my church, or me personally I couldn't give a rat's behind what any one does in their church.

Well, my Christian up bringing was in a community that emulated the Early Church, it wasn't a five and dime church from a group of leaders who only cared about the financial goals of their particular church.

This is basically what we have today.

Did not the Apostle Paul fight tooth and nail in defense of the Holy Church that was suppose to resemble the "Body of Christ," here on Earth?

This was all that I was doing.

It was only what the Lord Himself would expect of me.

I found out that whenever I would write about it or try to expose the evil of these particular leaders, I was always dismissed with the same argument.

"John, you need to forget about this, you are going to have to forgive those people. C'mon John, just get rid of your bitterness and anger and then you can become a good standing member again of the church in order to get your tithes right.

Did you ever think that perhaps it is because your not tithing that you have so many problems within our sacred walls? Think about this Brother John."

Well, I have no idea why the next thing that I knew, I had become the evil one. I suspect that in this great cover up, there was much slander, lying and gossip concerning me. It just never dawned on me at the time, that these leaders would do that. I just assumed at the time that they would explain the crime and then dismiss it to other leaders as some minor infraction that a few gals committed?

Like I said, "I am very naive when it comes to people's natures."

But you see, it was like when that girl in Grade School, lied right to my face as she was bearing false witness against me to that teacher. I was shocked.

Why wasn't Gail one of the good and proper people?

Well, a number of years have passed and I have felt that the Lord would have me to set the record straight. Whether anybody believes me or not, I couldn't give a rip.

The point of this letter, however, is not to defend myself, but to point out what is going on in our Government. We have an immature church all talking about the revivals of revival, the one that will usher in the second coming of the Lord Jesus Christ.

What I have witnessed is that the church just goes on, as if God is just pinching Himself to have such wonderful leaders in the church. Well, guys I don't think that He is. God looks at the motive of men's hearts and He is well aware that money is the motivating factor of many. Few actually care for the true "Body of Christ," else they would be defending it.

I think that it was last year, and I heard of an Apostolic meeting like no other in the modern day church. They were going to have so and so this year, and all would come together to revel in their wonderful exploits.

As I pondered the advertisement though, I thought to myself, "If I were to associate myself as one of these modern day American apostles, I would be ashamed to show my face before God along with the rest of these who claim apostleship.

What have they done other than to build material buildings and gather wealth?

No, a few years ago, I walked away from "Play Church" and started driving a truck. The Lord wouldn't let that last long though, so you better get used to this kind of exhortation again.

Is there not one of you in the church who understands the real reasons of the collapse of our society?

Is it any wonder the world has gathered together to take down our president who is likened to Cyrus of the Bible?

Is it any wonder that a woman can commit felony after felony, embezzle a billion or so dollars from her political leanings and she cannot be touched by authority that was suppose to have been backed by heaven?

Is it any wonder that we can have a Supreme Court Justice nominee and the man who has lived an exemplary life can be taken down by one or two false witnesses who can't even remember the details of their so called assaults?

Why is it that for decades God has not been able to help the church in defeating abortion?

Why is it that our society over night has adopted the perverse life styles of Americans who for centuries had to live their lives in shame?

Could it be that Hillary is not in prison because the church authorizes cover up after cover up of the infractions committed inside of it's sacred walls?

Could it be that Donald Trump is hated and treated as dirt because that is how the church treats it's own prophets sent from God?

Is it any wonder that a man like Brett Kavanaugh can be dismissed as a rapist and criminal by mere slander and gossip when the church treats it's prophets the same?

Could it be that the Lord desires more than anything to over turn these abortion decrees, yet his hands are tied because although the church professes life, many abortions are permitted and allowed through cover ups in the church?

Could it be that the Lord would like the church to honor and draw a line of demarcation concerning the issue of homo sexuality, yet the church just becomes more and more welcome and accepting to these people within the church?

God is a Holy God, how can He answer the prayers of the Saints when they pray one thing yet are totally accepting of it in their churches.

One time, Jesus told Peter, "Whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven. Whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven."

Many scholars have interpreted that to mean something similar to my paraphrase, "Whatever you allow in the church, I will allow. Whatever you forbid in the church, I will back you on that and forbid it, as well."

Have you ever asked your self why hasn't God forbidden that practice in the church?

Well, the answer to that question is found by looking to it's leaders.

God allows what your leaders have allowed, and the same is true for the American constitution backed government of the United States. Our government was based on a three way protection of itself, nevertheless, it was also written and assumed that there would be righteous men defending it.

Well, when our so called leadership loses it's backbone to stand up to tyrants then it is bound to fail, no matter how many built in protections it has.

Therefore as we have witnessed both in the political realm, as well as in the church realm there has been a destructive deterioration and erosion of righteousness, and we have only our cowardly leaders to blame for this fact.

That is my story, and I am sticking to it!

So, please don't say to me, " John, you just need to forgive those people."

They have been forgiven many times, but there is a story and a set of facts that need to be repeated.

No, church, you do not need to keep praying for revival to usher in, what you need to pray for, is for a true repentance to fall on this nation, and I am talking mainly here on our so called Spiritual leaders.


( I wrote some of the above yesterday and I finished it this morning, I am just now able to post it.

I haven't slept more than five minutes last night or today, yet feel compelled to finish it. I have two more papers that I feel the Lord would like me to share, so I am hoping that this has no major mistakes or screw ups.I am just too exhausted to go over it all and to edit it. All errors are my mistakes.)

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